Let’s be honest with each other right now: finding a double-sided dildo that actually works is a massive headache. If you have been browsing online, you have probably seen the complaints—toys that are too stiff, too heavy, or worse, ones that pop out the second you start getting into a rhythm. It kills the mood instantly.
We know you aren't looking for just "something plastic." You want connection. You want a toy that bridges the gap between you and your partner, literally and figuratively. Whether you are a lesbian couple looking to ditch the harness or simply exploring new sensations, we have tested the options to find what actually stays in place and feels incredible for both parties.
Quick Summary: Our Top Pick
What is the best double sided strap on?
After testing for stability, material safety, and motor power, our top recommendation is the Lesley: Triple-Motor Detachable Double Dildo for Lesbian Couples.
- Best Feature: It’s strapless with a U-shape design that hugs the pelvic bone, preventing slip-outs.
- Material: 100% Medical-Grade Body-Safe Silicone (Non-porous).
- Versatility: It detaches, so you get a couples' toy and a solo vibrator in one package.
Buying Criteria: How We Chose the Best
What makes a double dildo worth buying? A great double dildo must combine ergonomic stability (so it stays in), body-safe materials (so you stay healthy), and rumbly vibration power (so you both finish).
When we reviewed these toys, we looked strictly at three non-negotiable factors. Do not compromise on these when you are shopping.
1. Material Safety (The "Sniff" Test)
If a toy smells like a new shower curtain, throw it away. That smell is usually phthalates or other plasticizers off-gassing. We only recommend 100% medical-grade silicone. Silicone is non-porous, meaning it does not trap bacteria, and it warms to your body temperature quickly. According to sexual health resources like the University of Rochester Health Service, non-porous materials are essential for preventing infections like BV or yeast.
2. The "Stay-Put" Shape
Gravity is the enemy of the strapless strap-on. Many cheaper models are straight sticks. These inevitably slide out. We looked for Ergonomic U-Shapes or bulbous internal anchors. The internal arm (the part the wearer uses) needs to be slightly bulbous or textured to allow your PC muscles to grip it effectively.
3. Motor Functionality
Shared vibration is the game-changer. Standard double dildos are dead silicone—they fill you up, but they don't stimulate the clitoris. We prioritized toys with motors dedicated to both ends. You want deep, rumbly vibration, not a buzzy, mosquito-like sound that numbs you out.
Product Spotlight: Why We Recommend the Lesley
Why is the Lesley the best choice for couples? The Lesley solves the two biggest complaints regarding double dildos: lack of clitoral stimulation for the wearer and the inability to use the toy solo.
Most strapless options are rigid and intimidating. The Lesley: Triple-Motor Detachable Double Dildo for Lesbian Couples changes the dynamic by incorporating a smart, detachable design. Below is a breakdown of how it compares to standard market options.
| Feature | Generic Double Dildo | Bombex Lesley |
|---|---|---|
| Stability | Straight shaft, slips out easily | U-Shape ergonomic anchor |
| Stimulation | Usually non-vibrating | Triple-Motor (Both partners feel it) |
| Versatility | One solid piece | Detachable (Use solo or together) |
| Material | Often Jelly/PVC (Porous) | Medical-Grade Silicone |
One of the standout features we loved is the Triple-Motor design. Standard toys might vibrate at the tip, but the Lesley ensures the wearer gets specific clitoral stimulation while the receiver gets internal massage. Plus, if your partner is away, you can detach the external vibrator and use it for solo play, making it a "Buy One, Get Two" investment.
Mastering the Mechanics: 4 Positions for Strapless Play
How do you use a strapless double dildo without it falling out? It comes down to angles and muscle control. Using a toy like the Lesley requires a bit of practice, but once you nail the technique, the intimacy is unmatched. Because there is no harness barrier, you get full skin-to-skin contact.
Here are the four best positions we found for stability and maximum pleasure.
1. The Scissor Grind (Face-to-Face)
This is the "classic" lesbian sex position for a reason, but it works exceptionally well with a double dildo. Both partners lie on their sides, facing each other. Intertwine your legs so that your pelvic areas are aligned.
- Why it works: The side-lying position naturally keeps your thighs together, which helps hold the toy in place. You don't have to rely entirely on your internal muscles.
- The Trick: The wearer should insert the shorter end and use their thigh to press against the receiver's thigh. This creates a "clamp" effect. With the Lesley’s triple motors, the grinding friction here amplifies the vibration against both clitorises simultaneously.
2. The Rider (Cowgirl Variant)
The wearer lies on their back, and the receiver straddles them on top. This is often the most emotionally intimate position because it allows for deep eye contact and kissing.
- Why it works: Gravity helps the wearer here. Because the wearer is on their back, the toy rests naturally against them. The receiver controls the depth and speed.
- The Trick: The receiver should maintain a squatting or kneeling motion rather than sliding back and forth horizontally. Up-and-down movements prevent the toy from dislodging. The wearer can place their hands on the receiver's hips to guide the rhythm.
3. Spooning (Rear Entry)
Perfect for lazy Sunday mornings. Both partners lie on their sides, facing the same direction, with the wearer behind the receiver (Big Spoon/Little Spoon).
- Why it works: This is a high-contact position. The wearer can press their body completely against the receiver's back. The U-shape of the Lesley fits snugly here, and the external motor will press directly against the wearer’s clitoris while the internal shaft stimulates the receiver.
- The Trick: The wearer needs to use their PC muscles (Kegels) to grip the internal anchor. Since you don't have thigh pressure to help as much as in scissoring, a little extra lube is crucial to ensure the receiver's movement doesn't drag the toy out.
4. The Edge of the Bed
The receiver lies on their back at the edge of the bed with legs up or feet flat on the mattress. The wearer stands or kneels between the receiver's legs.
- Why it works: This offers the wearer the most control over thrusting. It mimics heteronormative positioning but adds the benefit of clitoral stimulation for the person "on top."
- The Trick: This is the advanced level. The wearer must have strong pelvic floor control to keep the toy anchored during thrusting. We recommend the wearer places their hands on the bed for leverage, allowing for more powerful movements without losing the toy.
Critical Safety & Hygiene: Don't Skip This
How do you clean and maintain a silicone double dildo? Sexual wellness isn't just about the orgasm; it's about staying healthy. Because the Lesley is made of medical-grade silicone, it requires specific care to last for years and keep your body safe.
The Lube Rule: Water-Based Only
We cannot stress this enough: Never use silicone lubricant with silicone toys. This is simple chemistry. Silicone lube acts as a solvent to silicone toys. Over time, it will fuse with the surface of your dildo, creating a gummy, pitted texture.
Once the surface is pitted, it becomes porous. Porous surfaces trap microscopic bacteria that you cannot wash away, leading to bacterial vaginosis (BV) or yeast infections. Always stick to a high-quality water-based lubricant. It is safe for the toy and safe for your internal pH balance. Since water-based lube absorbs into the skin, keep the bottle nearby to reapply during long sessions.
The Cleaning Routine
You are sharing fluids between two bodies, so hygiene is paramount. Here is our recommended cleaning protocol:
- Immediate Rinse: Before the "afterglow" nap, rinse the toy with warm water to remove excess fluids.
- Soap and Water: Use a fragrance-free, mild antibacterial soap or a dedicated sex toy cleaner. Avoid harsh detergents or soaps with essential oils, as these can irritate the vulva upon the next use.
- The Boiling Method (Optional but Recommended): Since the Lesley is detachable, you can remove the motor component. The silicone body (without the motor) can be boiled in water for 3-5 minutes to completely sterilize it. This is great if you have been prone to infections in the past. Note: Never boil the electronic motor part!
- Drying: Pat dry with a lint-free cloth or let it air dry. Do not use a towel that leaves fuzz behind. Store it in a silk or cotton bag, away from other silicone toys to prevent them from reacting to each other.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
Do strapless double dildos actually stay in?
Yes, but fit matters. A strapless dildo stays in by gripping the wearer's pelvic floor muscles. Toys with a bulbous anchor or a U-shape design, like the Bombex Lesley, provide better retention than straight toys. The wearer must also engage their Kegel muscles to help hold it in place during vigorous movement.
Can I use a double dildo if I am a beginner?
Absolutely. However, size is a factor. If you are new to penetration, look for a double dildo with a slimmer profile. The Lesley is designed with a realistic girth that is filling but not overwhelming, making it a great entry point for couples exploring strapless play for the first time.
Does the wearer feel pleasure too?
With the right toy, yes. Standard dildos often leave the wearer feeling "full" but not stimulated sexually. This is why we recommend vibrating options. The Lesley targets the wearer's G-spot internally and clitoris externally (via the vibrating motor), bridging the orgasm gap often found in strap-on sex.
Is it safe to swap ends during sex?
You should be cautious. If you swap ends, you are moving fluids between partners. If you and your partner have confirmed STI statuses and are fluid-bonded, this is generally acceptable. However, if you are using the toy for anal play, you must clean the toy thoroughly or change a condom on the toy before moving it to the vagina to prevent bacterial transfer.
How quiet is the Lesley double dildo?
Discretion is key for many of us living with roommates or family. The Lesley utilizes whisper-quiet motor technology. While it delivers deep rumbles, it does not produce that high-pitched mechanical whine associated with cheaper drugstore vibrators.
Final Thoughts: Leveling Up Your Intimacy
Investing in a high-quality double-sided strap-on is about more than just buying a sex toy; it is about investing in your shared intimacy. The frustration of slipping toys and awkward angles shouldn't stand in the way of your pleasure.
By choosing a body-safe, ergonomic option like the Lesley, you are setting the stage for hands-free, face-to-face connection that feels natural. Remember to communicate with your partner, use plenty of water-based lube, and have fun experimenting with the positions we detailed above.
Ready to transform your bedroom experience?
Shop the Lesley Triple-Motor Dildo Now
